Smile... It Is What It Is

So I wake up on a typical Wednesday for me, at 6 am. No not to go to typical work but for my "Mommy Work." You see my son Aidan has a g-tube or gastric tube by which he eats. It actually is a pretty cool contraption. He has a button on his skin that allows me to feed him formula or give him medicine while he sleeps. How many parents wouldn't want to give their kids yucky tasting medicine without them even knowing it, right?

In 2005 and again in 2006 Aidan developed pneumonia. From the best the doctors could figure out he aspirated on some meds I had given him, and it turned into pneumonia not once but twice. After that he really didn't have the desire to eat anymore. Not that I could blame him. So we had to make the tough decision to have a g-tube placed. Looking back I guess we should have seen it as the blessing it has become for him. He gains weight, grows and as much as possible stays pretty healthy. The only downside is the sleep thing for mom and dad.

We feed him at 6am, 10am, 2pm, 6pm and 10pm. So as you see someone has to be up for the 6am and the 10pm feedings. Sounds like we still have an infant, right? Unfortunately our "infant" is 6 years old :( I don't want it to sound like a bad thing because it isn't. How many parents would still love to hold their child, as I do mine. Have him stroke your face or hair, OK sometimes he pulls it but you know what I mean. Some nights I still rock him and he looks at me with the biggest most adoring eyes. For me that is everything.

Sometimes I cry because one of my babies can't say "Mommy" or "I love you" but I smile because his eyes say it to me every day.